Memory Lost (美人为馅): Chapter 162 (Final)

Chapter 162: Same Day Last Year

A year later, Jiangcheng.

Su Mian is standing in the office staring out the window at the misty rain.  It’s already autumn, but the rain has been coming down even more frequently, like a grey screen blanketing Jiangcheng.

Her arms are feeling sore.  She rubs them a bit and twitches her mouth into a smile.  It hurts.

The pain always makes her recall certain memories.  They’re like maggots inside her body; can’t get rid of them or bury them.

She stands there depressingly for a while before an old voice says full of energy, “Xiao Bai!  Hurry and review this new case!”

“Sure!” she answers crisply as she turns to walk over.

She has already regained her true identity a few months ago.  It has also been proven that the past incidents were done by the real “Bai Jin Xi.”  She has obtained a new identity card, but several old officers, like Old Zhou from Jiangcheng’s archives library, are still used to calling her “Xiao Bai.”  She’s also too lazy to correct them.

They carry the stack of files to the table together and then start to categorize them.  They get busy for a while before Old Zhou can’t help but sigh, “The number of cases on missing people has increased recently.  Look at these young college girls.”

Su Mian lets out a few sighs as well.  This young and old pair sigh together and curse these criminals in Jiangcheng dialect.

Old Zhou remembers something suddenly, “Do you remember a long time ago, there was a young fellow who came here in the middle of the night with you?”

Come here to the archives library with her in the middle of the night?

Su Mian understands.  He’s talking about Han Chen.

It has only been a month since she started working part-time here.  During this month, Han Chen has been traveling back and forth between City Lan and Jiangcheng and has never bumped into Old Zhou once.  Old Zhou usually stays in the library and doesn’t keep up with the news, so it’s normal that he doesn’t know about her past and present.  Although she often boasts about how handsome, capable, considerate, and loyal her boyfriend is in front of Old Zhou……she never talks too much about the past.

“I remember,” she says unhurriedly, “His name is Han Chen, wasn’t it?  What’s the matter?”

Old Zhou sighs, “That night, you silly girl was sleeping like a pig.  You didn’t know, but he was also searching for someone.” He talks about what happened that night and sighs, “At the time, that young fellow had a smoke with me.  What did he say again……Oh, ‘no name, don’t know what she looks like, and I don’t know whether she’s dead or alive. But she’s my fiancee.’ Sigh, it was a little unbearable.  I don’t even know if he has found her yet.”

The image of Han Chen when they first met floats into Su Mian’s mind.  That face full of arrogance, aloofness, and coldness. She tries to imagine what he looked like smoking and saying these words with her sleeping beside him.

She keeps quiet for a while.  She then scrunches up a piece of paper and disrespectfully throws it at Old Zhou, “Old Zhou, do you not have any skills on making inferences?  He already found his fiancee!”

“Huh?”

Su Mian laughs.  She looks down at her watch; it’s almost time for her to meet Han Chen.  She picks up her purse swiftly and fixes her long dress, “Bye bye, Old Zhou.  Hurry and think. I’ll reward you with a pack of cigarettes!”

Old Zhou is shocked, but he seems to understand a little.  But she has already left in a rush.

_____

Outside, it’s raining nonstop.

Su Mian is holding an umbrella as she walks out of the library.  She sees Han Chen’s car parked on the side. Not afraid of getting wet, he rolls down the window watching her come out.

He’s wearing a black windbreaker and a turtleneck sweater underneath.  His hand is on the steering wheel as he stares at her from inside of the car.

Su Mian can’t tell if it’s just her imagination, but why does she feel that even a casual glance from him seems to carry a sense of teasing now that they’ve been together for so long?  It’s as if he’s never tired of looking.

Alright, she’s probably just too full of herself.

Just as she’s about to hop into the car, she spots a few new scratch marks on the body of the car.  Su Mian says in surprise, “What happened to the car?”

Han Chen pushes open the passenger door gesturing for her to get in first and then says lazily, “It got scratched on the way here.”

“Hah?  Wait!” Su Mian switches on her strict-wife mode as she pinches his tall nose, “You weren’t racing with someone again, were you?”

Su Mian can’t be blamed for being overly anxious.

After the dust settled, they took absence without pay and left their investigation work behind.  She concentrated on accompanying and taking care of Han Chen who was recovering from his wounds.

She has always been the same.  But a certain someone, although still mature and dependable for the most part, has regained his temperament as a young master.

For example, he’s less hardworking and endures fewer hardships, yet he’s more laid back and picky like a young master.  He even needs her to pull out the fish bones by hand before eating it while he sits beside her and wait. She has to order imported coffee beans from online when he wants to drink coffee; he would grind them when she doesn’t know how, but puts her down, “How did you swindle me to be with you?  You don’t even know how to grind coffee.” Su Mian pushes him away, “Get lost!”

As for street racing, it’s probably a favorite hobby that every man who loves car racing can’t forget regardless of age.  Moreover, he’s only twenty-eight to nine years old. Therefore, after settling down, he drives the car by himself at night a few times and never tells Su Mian where he’s going.  He comes back spinning the keys with his pinky looking rather in a good mood.

Later, they receive a few speeding ticket bills at home.  As a past police officer, Su Mian would forgive him for having a little fun every now and then.

Although he’s not talkative, his young master temperament has subsided a little now.

For example, after hearing Su Mian’s criticism, he answers indifferently, “Am I that careless?  Would I be street racing when it’s pouring and cause traffic? It was some a–hole who lacked skills and scratched my car.”

Su Mian is speechless.

Just listen to that.  He’s full of arrogance and even calling someone an a–hole.

They continue chatting as they drive home in the rain.

“The temperature has gone down today.  I bought some lamb meat in the afternoon.  We can eat it with hotpot tonight to warm up,” Su Mian says.

“Mm.”

“You have to wash the veggies.”

He says unconcernedly without glancing at her, “Sure.  As long as you don’t make me do work for nothing.”

Su Mian understands what he means and scolds, “You scoundrel!”

The corners of Han Chen’s mouth curve into a slight smile.

They are still living at the place Su Mian has been renting since the beginning.  Although it’s a bit old, it’s just right with two people.

As they approach the entrance, Su Mian spots three familiar figures standing at the door dodging from the rain.  The moment they see their car, two of them wave immediately.

Su Mian grins from surprise.  Han Chen smiles as well.

They park the car.  Su Mian gets off right away.  Han Chen opens an umbrella and holds her shoulder as they walk toward the group.

“Yo!  It’s rare to see you guys here!” Su Mian has a loud mouth and starts to act surprised, “What brings you, three handsome guys here?”  She laughs right after finishing saying it.

It’s not wrong to call them handsome.  Although Zhou Xiao Zhuan’s looks pull down the average of the three, dressing well plays a big part.  He’s learned now; he’s no longer wearing those big cotton-padded jackets, and instead, he has started to wear standing-collar jackets!  With the three of them standing together like this, their presence is quite strong.

But the instant Zhou Xiao Zhuan speaks, his aura breaks with a snap.  It’s because he acts alongside Su Mian well! He lets out a long sigh and says poetically, “Since farewell at City Lan, we’ve missed you much.  So we’ve come today!”

Before he finishes, Chatterbox knocks on his forehead, “Xiao Zhuan, get to the point!”  He turns to look at Su Mian and the others, “Oh man, how come it took you guys so long to come home!  Cold Face said we shouldn’t bother you guys for a ride, so we’ve been waiting here for half a day now!  We’re starving and need to eat!”

Su Mian bursts out laughing.  Cold Face, who hasn’t said anything, smiles as well.  He exchanges glances with Han Chen, nods, and that concludes their greeting with each other.

Su Mian guides them up to the stairs.  As she walks, she can’t help but turn to glance at Cold Face, “Cold Face, why do I feel that you’ve……gained weight recently?”  Of course, he’s still handsome as usual. It’s just that his chiseled face that made him look thin before now seems smoothed out and rounded.

Before Cold Face answers, Xiao Zhuan butts in, “He boils soup for his girlfriend every day.  It’s making him fat!”

Chatterbox expresses his complaint, “You guys don’t even know.  We haven’t had a single sip of soup lately.”

Cold Face interrupts them, “Nonsense.”

His word is too cold and painful and valuing sex over friendship.  Chatterbox and Xiao Zhuan take turns sighing. Su Mian giggles while Cold Face is calm and composed.  Han Chen smiles slightly but doesn’t comment. On the topic of women, they are the winners in life; they just can’t bring themselves down to Chatterbox and Xiao Zhuan’s level to carry out in-depth conversations.

_____

A boiling hot pot warms up the place; the windows fog up slowly.  The night scenery outside of the window becomes blurry. On this cold day, it seems as if only this apartment is spreading the warmth.

The five of them are sitting around a small rectangular table.  It’s a bit squishy, but they don’t mind. Chatterbox clicks his tongue and teases seeing Su Mian bringing out the lamb meat slices, “Gees……you are so caring to Leader.  You know that Leader is from the North and loves to eat lamb, so you buy him such great food!”

Su Mian answers calmly, “Of course!  Since you don’t have a wife, you won’t understand.”

Chatterbox: Holy Sh-t!

He suddenly realizes a hard cold truth.  Whenever he’s with this group of people, he’s always the one getting stabbed!

They eat, drink, and chat together.  Chatterbox and Cold Face make eye contact, and Xiao Zhuan puts down his chopsticks as well.

They didn’t come just for fun.  They do have business here.

Cold Face raises his glass to Han Chen and they drink the last bit of wine.  He puts down the glass and says, “We’ve found the bones.”

At an instant, the apartment is completely quiet.

Su Mian pauses holding her chopsticks.  She lifts her head to look at him and puts down her chopsticks.  Han Chen’s arm is resting on the back of the chair. He’s a bit drunk but his eyes are shining, “Tell me.”

The surface area of the Peninsula development was very large and very deep on top of its soil issue.  After the incident, the excavation continued.

Cold Face says simply, “They dug up a few bone pieces a couple of days ago.  After the DNA test results, it matched up with Xu Si Bai. But we haven’t found the remaining pieces.  Furthermore, Xiao Yao is still nowhere to be found. Xiao Yao is now on the national wanted list.”

Everybody is silent.  Su Mian doesn’t say anything.  Her pupils are dark as she remains quiet.

“I understand,” Han Chen says.

Chatterbox speaks suddenly, “Speaking of which, Leader, Su Mian, when are you two going to come back to the team?  Captain Qin and the Chief are always mentioning the two of you!” The moment he finishes, Zhou Xiao Zhuan looks toward them with his eyes gleaming immediately.  Those eyes are glistening like a young deer. Although Cold Face hasn’t said anything, his gaze is also full of anticipation.

Han Chen smiles and takes a sip of wine.  Su Mian looks up and exchanges a gaze with him.

“It’s up to him.”

“It’s up to her.”

They say at the same time.

They’re both stunned slightly.  The other three roars, “Oh man! A married couple sure does sing along with each other!” “This is too much!” “Come back then!”

……

It’s already late at night by the time the three of them leave.

Han Chen drives them back and agrees to take them to eat good seafood and drink at Jiangcheng tomorrow.  Su Mian washes the dishes, unplugs the electric pot and tucks it away in the cupboard. But she’s stunned.

She returns to the middle of the room and is in a daze.  She opens the door to the balcony.

The sun is setting, blanketing her view.  In the hazy color, the lower buildings around have already turned on their lights.  Smokes are rising from the cooking, and the smell of food permeates the air. In the convoluted alleyways, some people are walking hurriedly, and someone is shouting.  Everywhere is filled with a sense of peacefulness.

She stares at the scenery for a long time before lifting her gaze and looking far away.

The most beautiful building in Jiangcheng stands by the Yangtze River.  The neon signs above have already lit up. The sky hasn’t turned completely dark yet, so it makes the colors look dim as it shines onto the river surface.

The Yangtze river is wide, straight, and gray looking.  It moves slowly between the two shores. Other than the boats on it, there is nothing else.

Tears slowly begin to fall from Su Mian’s eyes.

Han Chen is back.  He slides open the balcony door lightly.  Without saying anything, he hugs her from behind.  Su Mian holds onto his hands. They embrace each other quietly until the night sky appears.  Her body becomes warm because of him.

_____

The rain is not only falling in Jiangcheng, but it’s also falling on a small town upstream of Yangtze River.

The name of the town is unknown.  Only the local people live there. The small town has dark cyan pavement and big trees with canopies that are large enough to cover the road.  There are very few people on the streets when it’s raining. It gets cold at night and there is almost no one on the streets.

At the corner of a street, a new flower shop opened a few days ago.  It’s quite rare in the small town, but everybody has gotten used to it.  The shop doesn’t have a name, but its flowers smell especially nice and are especially fresh.  You can smell the faint scent of the flowers when passing by. The shop owner is a young man who’s gentle, polite, and taciturn.  Therefore, the people in the town all have a good impression of him.

The sky is already very dark.  The rain continues to shower, hitting the front of the doorstep.  The shop is still lit. That man is standing holding scissors as he trims the flowers.

“Boss!  I want to buy Carnation,” a high school student looking girl lifts up the curtains and dashes inside, “Just one.”

Her clothes and shoes look rather worn out for a girl her age.  Her backpack isn’t pretty or of a new style. It’s easy to tell that her family isn’t very wealthy.

“Sure,” the shop owner puts down the scissors, picks out the biggest one and hands it to her.

The high schooler examines the flower and her face blushes slightly smiling, “It’s my mom’s birthday today.  Giving her a Carnation should be right, right? How much is it?”

The shop owner smiles politely and says, “It’s one flower for your mom, so no need to pay.”

The highschooler thanks him putting both hands together, “Boss, you’re too nice!  Thank you! I don’t need to use up tomorrow’s breakfast money then! If any of my classmates need to buy flowers next time, I’ll definitely take them here.  You can rest assured!”

The shop owner smiles slightly, “Thank you then.  Take care on your way home.”

“Mm!” the high schooler turns around to leave, but is captivated by the purple color flowers beside the door, “Boss, what kind of flowers are these?  They’re so pretty.”

The shop owner hums and answers, “Qi Ye Jin.”

In front of a young man, girls tend to be a bit more playful, so she smiles and asks, “Do you like these flowers a lot?  There are so many here. Are they expensive?”

But the shop owner answers, “No, I don’t really like them.”

The girl lets out a, “Oh,” says goodbye and leaves.

After a brief moment of silence, he looks at the rain outside.  There probably won’t be any more people coming this late. He closes the shop, but when he turns around, he sees the large amount of Qi Ye Jin.

He’s a bit stunned.

That’s right, he doesn’t like them a whole lot.  It’s just that some things can only be remembered this way. (Qi Ye Jin — lit. Seven-leaf clover: grows a leaf each year and blooms when has seven leaves, but withers after blooming three times, which is when it has twenty-one leaves)

Or perhaps, there is no need to remember it anymore.

Tears suddenly flow from the young man’s eyes.

Buried deep underground, a pile of bones unclaimed; that should be his real home.

It’s what he deserves.

……

The most simple existence of the universe,

crisscrossing and turning repeatedly.

The most complicated form of life

loses morning and gains night.

He says that everybody is born different, but how different are they?

When you look up at the stars in the sky, and when you look down at the vast land like a crouching beast…

Have you ever spotted me?

I’m just an ordinary person.  Perhaps I’ll live my life busily like the rest of them.

But I will still be me.  I am afraid of being let down and desire for someone to cherish me.

Have you ever seen my eyes in your dreams?

Have you ever remembered my words and the blurry contours of my face?

Have you ever been like me and be lost in a beautiful dream not willing to wake up yet not wanting to turn back.

Do you know that at the time, I held out my heart to you?

Before finding you and after losing you, happiness never once came.